Step 4.7: What’s Your Ask?
“When you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true.”
- Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist
Asking for help is like going to therapy – nobody wants to admit they need it, but everyone does. It’s very hard to show weakness. Or admit that you don’t have all the answers.
Here's the thing: People actually want to help. They will bend over backwards to help you - if you can make it as easy as possible for them with a very specific ask that leaves room for their thoughts & ideas.
Vague asks get you nowhere except coffee meetings full of "thoughts and prayers" bullshit. I call these “Barney Meetings” — conversations where there’s a lot of “I love you, you love me” but that ultimately don’t lead to any results.
Here’s where to start:
Start by making a list of the friends & business contacts who can best help you.
Be specific AF when you speak with them: Not "I need a job." Instead: "I'm targeting VP roles in fintech, specifically payments. Here's my plan. What am I missing? What would you do? Who should I speak with?" Use the “Search Grid” you created in Step 02 to inform this.
Say thanks. Doesn’t need to be complicated - a simple text or email works - but don’t forget to do this.
Close the loop. People love success stories. Don't ghost them after they help.
Remember: Every titan of industry got there through someone else's door. Swallow your pride and make the ask. You’ll be surprised at where it leads you.
Your Playbook:
Who are the friends that can help you? Make a list.
Who are the business contacts that can help you? Make a list.
Go back to the Search Grid you created in Step 02 to outline the specific questions you will ask them. Make a list.