Step 6.3: Ask For Help
Asking for help is hard. Here’s the secret - people will bend over backwards to help you if you can make it easy for them - especially if you’re someone who will appreciate the help.
Here’s how to lean on your network to get what you need - without burning bridges.
Let's talk about one of the more difficult parts of the career hunt: asking for help. Most people either never ask or ask so badly they burn their network before they need it most.
Here's the truth: It’s hard to ask for help. The good news is that people want to help; they just need you to make it easy for them. Here’s the secret: they probably also could use your help. Maybe not right now, but definitely in the future.
Here’s the architecture of a successful ask:
Be EXTREMELY clear in what you’re looking for:
Not: "Can we grab coffee?"
But: "Would you spend 20 minutes helping me understand the fintech landscape? Your experience at Square would be invaluable."
Understand the value exchange:
Not: "Can you refer me?"
But: "Here's what I bring to the table, and here's why it might matter to your network."
Make it easy for them to say yes:
Make it simple to help you
Provide clear next steps
Respect their time like it's your own
As you make your asks, remember that you’re a reflection of their own Personal Brand. For someone to make an introduction for you, they’re recommending you to others. Because of this, I’ve always made it a practice to only refer / introduce people that I know will be seen as an extension of my own Personal Brand.
We’ve talked about getting your
Your Inner Circle
Who needs daily updates?
Who's your emotional support?
Who keeps you accountable?
Your Professional Network
Who can open doors?
Who can make introductions?
Who can provide intelligence?
Your Digital Community
Who amplifies your message?
Who engages with your content?
Who spreads your story?
Your Playbook:
Always lead with value: share insights, make connections and offer help first
Make it specific: be very clear on these questions: “What exactly do you need?”, “From whom specifically? and “By when ideally?”
Follow up religiously: thank promptly, update regularly and close the loop always
Remember: Your network isn't your emergency contact list. It's your career's immune system. The market rewards those who make it easy for others to help them. Because the only thing worse than asking for help is needing it when your network has gone cold.